One summer, a few years ago, I spent seven weeks in Maine working at a small hospital emergency room. During those times, I was all alone. Our children were in Virginia with their grandmother, and my husband was working full-time in Tennessee. Every day I called him and we chatted, and while I enjoyed talking with him, something was always missing. It was that personal touch and emotional connection that I so desperately wanted. I just wanted to be in his presence and cuddle.
Cuddle: “as to hold close in an affectionate manner; hug tenderly, lie close and snug.” ~ Dictionary.com
Spending time in the arms of your love is cuddling, and the best types of cuddles are an art form. A quality cuddle shows and communicates a level of affection that words cannot. Knowing these different cuddling types will allow you to share your affection for your loved one in times that are needed most.
1. The temperature cuddle
This one is best used in the winter months or on a chilly night, or for those cold feet as written about here. Late nights by the fireside, sitting on the porch swing, or watching the sunset on a cool evening…it’s all about getting close to your loved one and allowing their body temperature to warm you up. Not to mention, it is faster and more economical than trying to add another jacket or blanket.
2. Scary Cuddle
Stormy nights & scary movies suddenly are not so bad when you are able to use the scary cuddle. The feeling of closeness does not change the weather or the movie, but suddenly everything seems a little bit better.
3. Presence cuddle
This is done to let the other person know that you are there for them. Talking is not required at this time. It is often used during times when one is ill. Medications have been given, treatments performed, but one person is still not well. The presence cuddle shows a great amount of love and time because the person doing the cuddling realizes that it is their companionship that will comfort the other during the time of illness.
He imagined them sitting somewhere, just enjoying each other’s company, her head on his chest, his arm around her. And he realized how desperately lonely he had become. ~ Tim LaHaye: Tribulation Force
4. Grief cuddle
Just like the presence cuddle, words are not needed during this time. The grief cuddle is used during times of great loss and possibly even death. It is a time to allow your love and affection, for the ones sharing the grief, to let healing to begin to form in your hearts. It has been said that grief is a wound that only time can heal, but I say the road to healing is found in togetherness. Just as a child will climb up onto his mother’s lap when he is hurt, we can find healing through the physical presence of a cuddle.
5. Romantic Cuddle
A great way for a husband and wife to enjoy each other’s company and touch is the romantic cuddle. This is a wonderful time to gaze deeply into each other’s eyes and share gentle touch between the two of you. Spending these moments together allow you to communicate your love and trust for each other. To lean back into their presence and let your guard down, shows vulnerability.
“The best marriages are the ones where we can go out in the world and really put ourselves out there. A lot of times we’ll fail, and sometimes we’ll pull it off. But good marriages are when you can go home and know that your vulnerability will be honored as courage, and that you’ll find support.” Brene Brown
6. Passionate Cuddle
A continuation of the romantic cuddling, but the touch and gazing has turned more passionate and heated! And this is a good thing! By allowing the romantic cuddle to take place, it often will lead to the more passionate cuddle.
7. Sleepy cuddle
After a long busy day, no better ending can be found than in the sleepy cuddle. Resting back into the arms of your loved one, resting your head on their shoulder, feeling the warmth of their presence…and your body slowly relaxing down. Ahh, the sleepy cuddle! Sweet dreams are dancing around your head, and very soon you find yourself slipping into the best night of sleep you have ever had.
In conclusion, touch and presence are important to every relationship. Good communication skills, talking and texting, saying the right words will always be critical. But just as important is a quality touch in the form of your presence in a good cuddle. Knowing and using these seven different types of cuddles will make a positive change in your relationship as it will increase the love and trust that you have for each other.